Aka-FA on DeviantArthttps://www.deviantart.com/aka-fa/art/OC-Garmine-on-the-train-665348114Aka-FA

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OC: Garmine on the train

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Description

maybe it's because you're sitting on two chairs and still spilling over.

EDIT: Check out the generally improved and coloured version here:  OC: Garmine on the train by Aka-FA
Image size
2550x3300px 1.17 MB
© 2017 - 2024 Aka-FA
Comments8
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CaramelCurves's avatar
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Vision
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star-half::star-empty: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Impact

Howdy. You probs haven't seen me much before, used to just lurk. But this'll be my first review with this account.

First things first: Vision.

The intended sorta goal of this picture is evident, Garmine is a character whose pretty self conscious about her weight but having her so stuffed into a chair like that in a public space just emphasizes the point even more. You achieved what you were going for needless to say.

Originality wise... well, plenty of artwork exists of tubby girls being squeezed into small spaces, especially within the community of FA's and the like. But what you managed to do is portray a situation not always shown by FA's, and you combine two sort of situations, being crammed like that and also a bit of humiliation which is always decent.

Technique wise, your drawing skills and lineart look pretty accurate to how a big girl like that would probably be. I'd personally think that you could've gone for smaller lines and stuff showing pulled fabric and a bit more details, especially where her leg is overflowing near the armrest as well as maybe giving a bit more attention to the background.

The perspective is slightly odd as well what with the chairs in front, as its showing her front on but the way the chairs are in front of her is implying that were seeing her from a slightly above angle, and you got a bit of clipping with some of your lines with the seat and leg, noticeably the right leg (her left) and the chair in front of her.

Impact wise you did pretty well. Garmine is a big gal with bigger insecurities and you played on this well showing a pretty tight situation for her, and having the funny lil bit of the gent/person in front listening to her having a sarcastic thought is icing on a sugary cake.

Overall pretty decent but you should really polish those details n stuff; then the whole thing will look cleaner and it'll pop more, and even though this drawing is a lot more simple it'll give an idea of texture more if you do the fixes.